 How to attract people ? - Superdave
I was in a relationship for 1 month, I loved the girl
very much. I get attached to girls very fast, as soon as
I feel I like them I get attached very quickly. She
dumped me for no apparent reason, except that she said I
was sometimes rude with her, verbally speaking.
Honestly, I don't think I'm rude, I'm everybody's
friend ! It has been a year now, and I think I overcame
it now. I lost my only good female friend though, and I'm
very lonely even though I have many male friends. I was
wondering, what should I do to be more attractive to
girls (I'm 21 years old ?)
I'm 220 pounds, which may be an issue, but I don't
really think so for most of you girls out there. Am I
right ? I'm 5"11, short hair, my teeth are white and
straight. What am I missing ?
People told me : smile more, wear brighter clothing.
What else ? Must I absolutely lose weight ? Where are the
girls ? What do they want to hear/do ? I'm getting *very*
lonely here :(
I really would appreciate any general advice about how
to attract girls.
 From: just a
girl
I don't think your weight is really a problem I guess.
It really depends on how you carry it. The #1 thing to
attract girls is to always be a gentleman. Charm is
always a favorite. Some- how alot of men forget that as
their relationships progress. They forget to open doors,
say thank you for things they may think should be taken
for granted. Always be as polite to someone you are
involved with as you would be to an elder you truly
respect. #1. Charm #2. Don't talk about yourself alot,
ask about her. People love to talk about themselves.
Truly listen though.
From: Superdave
Hi girl,
I think you are right, although some girls might be
annoyed by a guy that is ALWAYS acting like a gentlemen.
Well... wait, I think I'm wrong : I told myself, when our
relationship began, that I would stay natural, without
forcing myself into unusual or special behaviour or
excessive "attention" towards her. I guess I
was definitely wrong on that one.
As for not talking about ourselves too much, I also
think you are right. A friend introduced me to his new
girlfriend and later told me that she was constantly
talking about her, which he felt was becoming more and
more annoying.
Listen friend, anything up for tip #3, #4 or #5 even ?
:)
Thank you VERY much, I appreciate it a lot.
From: Somebody's mother
Hi Dave,
The thing that made me do a double take on the man I
eventually married was that when I wouldn't give him my
phone number (because I didn't know him well enough yet)
he didn't pout or get pushy. He said he understood my
caution and continued to treat me with the same friendly
openness. I think it was the combination of respect for
my feelings, the obvious self-confidence of being able to
handle a minor rejection with aplomb, and the fact that
he continued to be interested in me even though dating
might have been out of the question that really made a
huge impression.
In short, try thinking of women as potential friends
instead of potential relationships. If something more
develops, great! If not, you'll have a bunch of good
friends -- nothing to turn up your nose at.
From: The Mrs
I definitely agree with somebody's mother. In
actuality, most of the women you really want to have
around are not going to be obsessed with your looks but,
instead with the respect and honest affection (which is
more likely to be communicated with a smile or a gentle
touch than with any sexual contact) that you give them.
For the most part develop friendships which are built on
common interest (face it, if you are looking for
long-term you need to have a better foundation than
"Gee! She looks good" In all honesty you, also
have to understand that getting that serious after a
short period of time could actually frighten them off.
Face it today's ladies are filled with constant images of
strange shy men who are stalking women. Although these
are real problems, they have been made to be more normal
than not through movies and talk-shows. Be kind and
patient there is a perfect provision (to quote Dennis
Rainey) for you also. Surprise! they often show up when
you least expect it. My other advice to you is be old
fashioned in your manners, open her car door, send her
flowers (or pick them) don't just date her court her.
Good luck
From: Reader
Dear Dave, The only thing you should really do is try
to be yourself. Be kind, understanding, do not leap
before you look or you could get into a relationship that
you do not really like. From my own experience that I
have been going out with a girl for about a month and we
are getting along fine . No more talk about me. Treat her
the way you think she should be treated. There is no more
that I can say but be yourself, and maybe you will do
fine and end up with a woman that you really love.
P.S. Do not worry about a thing you will do fine.
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