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 How do men want women to love
them - dove
hi everybody. I am needing some advice from you guys
out there. how do men really want women to treat them? I
am in love with a man that has HD and is literally
pushing me away. I love this man's sprit and good nature,
but he doesn't really think I can handle his disease. he
blames me for getting upset with him because he won't let
me get any closer to him than being with him
occasionally. I am very sad that he doesn't want to be
around me although I think he wants to be. Why do men act
like they don't want you around them when they do? I have
yet to figure this out. He started out wanting to spend
every minute of every day with me and now I can't even
get him to talk to me on the phone. I would like to know
what to do to gain his love once again. Am I into a
relationship that I should give up on or what? What do
you guys REALLY want from women? You say that you want
honesty, when you get it, you freak.
 From: wheeler
Hi dove, I am wheeler. I think that both woman and men
want to be loved the same. We often get into situations
that we don't understand (though we want to) and we get
confused and our thoughts get all messed up. Maybe a
little space for awhile might help or someone else more
neutral like a mediator. I don't know or have your
answers but I will pray for you both. Read "a few
thoughts" by Bernd. (I think that who it was,
01-20-97) Really neat and a different way of seeing
things. Peace!
From: dove
wheeler, hi. I read that yesterday, going through
trying to put some sense to this. You see, He and I met
at a meeting we both attend around the first of November.
At first, we just went places together, rented movies,
cooked dinner, etc. We really began to care about one
another. then we went to a conference together and the
friendship got pushed into another realm, not physical
but yet very very close. We continued this until around
the 2nd week of December. When he first started seeing
me, he told me he had this disease called Huntington's. I
didn't know what it was so I cam to work and pulled it up
and it's a bad bear. Total mental and physical shutdown
at the end. After diagnosis, 5-15 years of life left. He
also has this old girlfriend that keeps calling and she
has a little girl that she uses to manipulate him because
he loves the little girl. I feel insecure about this
because she has a child and I don't. I want to scream
this has gotten me so crazy inside. I know he cares about
me, but this is something that has gotten to be almost
too much. I seem to always pick these men that are
unavailable either emotional or otherwise and I end up
getting very hurt by it. It seems that I just have this
bad luck when it comes to men. I don't know. I'm very
attractive, (so they say) and I have a great personality
(so they say) but when it comes down to the closeness and
commitment, neither myself or the man can or is willing
to commit.
From: Wheeler
Hey Dove, just read your letter and it sounded like I
was reading about myself and my latest relationship. I
know its hard to deal with and I have been trying to deal
with my past girlfriend for a long time now. But its me
that won't or can't seem to "let go and let
god" not her. She wants to be "just
friends" (and it seems like its on her terms too).
Sometimes I wonder why I won't let go of what I feel for
her. She is seeing someone else and getting on with her
life and I haven't dated in years. But I have learned
that SPACE and FRIENDSHIP go hand in hand. Keep Hope and
Faith with you and I know it will help ease some of the
pain. Peace.
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