Re: Verbal Abuse Advise

Re: Verbal Abuse Advise ----- From: Josie - Date: 07 Nov 1997

There are no 'bad' people? Really? I too, will have to disagree with you Kim and so will my friend Celia.

Her father died recently and only now whilst trying to sort his things out has found out the cause of his (on, off) depression whilst alive.

He was a jew in a concentration camp and all his family apart from him who was left for dead and scaped, were tortured and died in terrible conditions.

All this as a result of what I can only call the EVIl (BAD) of Hitler. And yes they were VICTIMS in all the sense of the word. Read 'People of the Lie" by Scott Peck if you can.

Evil as well as Good (God) are indeed,well and truly alive. I agree with Trish and with Arthur and I think that to say that "here are no victims in this world" is an insult to people who through no fault of their own have fell pray to evil people.

I can think of many, many circumstances; children, victims of sexual abuse and other abuses, racism....

Of course I do agree with you that once we know what somebody who has by all intents pretended to be something that they were not are like it is up to us to try and get out of the situation.

When I was seven years old this old man who sell sweets in a stall in Spain used to sit me on his knee and give me sweets.

I thought he was a kind old man, like my grandpa who must be respected. Then the touching started...

I was so innocent Kim, I did conciously or unconsciously make choose for him to do this. It used to make me feel really uncomfortable everytime he tried to put his hand inside my panties and I always wriggled out so he took his hand away.

I was baffled why he was doing that and I just "knew" it was a mistake and he did not realise he had his hand in my panties.

When I took my first communion in my white little dress I ran to see him because it was the happiest day in my life. His wife was at the stall and I liked her very much too.

Well that day he completely ignored me whilst his wife said how pleased she was that I had taken my first comunion and how beautiful my dress was and gave me a big kiss.

I was so baffled by his behaviour and so upset and I told my mum...Of course I was forbidden to go and buy sweets threre again and later on we found out he had been molesting other children too.

It was only a few years ago that I realised what had really happened and that I had been molested. I just completely broke down...I keep releiving my memories of what happened over and over and I still don't know why it happened but I certainly don't think that I chose for it to happen at any level and I did not even know anything about sex at that time.

Anyway I don't know why I've just told you about this as it is something that I don't tell people about.

I know that it does make me feel dirty when I think about it, even guilty but I don't know why. I just can't figure it out but it does hurt. Take care...Josie