Re: To NiceGuy

Re: To NiceGuy ----- From: Barbara - Date: 17 Dec 1997

Rapunzel,

Sounds like you are talking directly to me! I think I am in the same position that NiceGuy is in and that you say you once were. My boyfriend wants to be "just friends" too, but he has not made it entirely clear that this is really all he ever wants. In fact, he says that his feelings for me haven't changed, but I guess at this point he doesn't know if he is ready for a relationship. This ambivalence makes it soooo hard to try to let him go. My feelings for him are as strong as they ever were and I know I am torturing myself by agreeing to being "just friends". But because there is a glimmer of hope that he will want to get back together some day, I just can't let go. I see a lot of this "love euphoria" in me. I know that I have been much too emotionally dependent on him, that is probably one reason why was uncomfortable with our relationship . I do recognize a lot of my unhealthy patterns, but I am not really sure how to change them. Is it possible to work my way through this and then start a more healthy relationship with him again (if he should ever be ready for that)?