Re: To NiceGuy

Re: To NiceGuy ----- From: rapunzel - Date: 17 Dec 1997

Dear Barbara,

Oh, I don't know as I'm a good person to be giving advice! The whole reason I broke contact with my ex was because I was SO angry and humiliated I couldn't bear to look at him anymore. (We worked together, too, which made it REAL interesting - kids, just say NO to workplace relationships!) It took a good six months of total isolation from him, passing him in hallways without so much as looking at him, taking his phone number off my speed dial, etc., before I began to realize that it was actually kind of nice to be semi-stable emotionally, instead of jerked up and down depending on the presence/mood of another person.

I think I'd suggest that you take a break from this guy, friend or no. You need some time to figure out what your real feelings about all this are, and to process the hurt and rejection. You may feel he's holding out hope to you for a future, but I think a lot of people do that because they don't want to hurt someone they really care about. And if there *IS* hope for a future for you two, a "cleansing" break from one another would be the BEST thing you could do for your future relationship. Partnerships are stronger when each member is strong on their own.

Good luck,