When things seem to go to hell in a
hand-bucket in our relationship, do I jump in the bucket
too for the ride? Maybe I let what is happening around me
dictate my own personal progress, my enjoyment of life,
and my attitudes. Do I really need to do this? When I do,
I get discouraged because our relationship is not turning
out the way I hoped. I try to find ways to
"fix" things, and when they don't work, I
become deeply disappointed and disillusioned, and find
myself crawling inside my own personal black pit.
It isn't reasonable for me to expect my
SO to conform to what I think they should be, or
behave the ways I think they should. It's just as
reasonable to expect the weather to be exactly the way I
want, when I want it.
Once I realize that my partner is a
totally separate person, and they have chosen to share
themselves with me, not give themselves to me, I
can see that trying to change them or their moods will
usually lead me to disappointment. When I decide to get
the most out of each day regardless of what difficulties
life is presenting me, my example will be the most
powerful influence I could ever give to my SO.
Just for Today
Today, if I blame my relationship for
making my life difficult and pulling me down, I'll take a
careful look at whether I'm really a victim or a
There are many things I can't change,
but I can change the way I react to them. No matter which
direction our relationship seems to be heading, I'll
continue to make each day the best it can be for me.
When life goes into reverse, don't go with it.
@Copyright Bernd Hansen - Contents may
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